What do you have in common with others?

This morning I heard a guy on the radio ask what I consider to be a stupid question. He asked his partner if he had more in common with a white liberal or a black conservative. His partner, who is white, said well that depends on what they are into. Just to be upfront with you – I think the first guy is a jerk (in general, bit just because of this) and the second guy gave the right answer!

So I am thinking – for me, which is it? And I am 100% with the second guy. I do have skin color and political leanings in common with the white liberal. But I would need to know so much more to say who I have more in common with. Do they like jazz, classical music, kids? Did they grow up in a small town in the midwest? Do they have advanced degrees, and if so, in what?  Do they have kids? Do they like to play games, especially word games? Are they in long-term relationships? Did they grow up as a preacher’s kid?

You know, none of the answers to any of these questions make them either good or bad, it just gives me more to go on to know if we have much, or anything, in common. I am so much more than my political beliefs, and they probably are too. If they are not much more than their political beliefs, then that is something we do NOT have in common.

There is nothing wrong with finding out what you have in common with someone, but look at the whole person, not just a portion of them. I have brown hair too, and there may be a bunch of serial killers out there with brown hair – that doesn’t mean I have anything else in common with them – or maybe I do, but killing people isn’t one of them.

Leave a comment